Cock Dialed

Email conversation the other day...

Me: Good morning Daddy! Just a reminder, today is your mom's birthday.  

Heron: Thanks! Dealing with a downed network...ugghh!

Me: Yeah...you butt dialed me:)

Heron: Not so.  The phone was in my front pocket.  It wasn't my butt that did the dialing:)

Me:  Haha...I'm used to being cock blocked...not cock dialed.
  
Heron: <Crickets>

OK...well it seemed funny in my head!!

All In My Head

I still have a little more to write about our cabin adventure, but I just thought this was too funny not to share.  

 

 
I don't know about all of you fellow bloggers, but sometimes I do my best blog writing in the car.  I can have an entire post laid out in my head while driving from one place to another.  Now whether or not I can remember it all when I finally sit down in front of my computer is an entirely different issue.  You know...the whole getting older thing really sux! 

Today, I had to be somewhere at 4:30.  As I exited the freeway, I was right on time.  I turned left crossing back over the freeway, needing to take a quick left just over the bridge.  Well, apparently I was off in la...la land somewhere in my head thinking about a blog post and turned left too early, putting myself right back on the expressway.  I had to go three miles down, turn around and try it all again.

Needless to say, I didn't make it on time!

A Little of This...and Alot of That

Well, today was pretty much a suck fest at work...and not as in the good kind of sucking.  So, I am sitting down to enjoy a cranberry/vodka while I write this.  Hopefully it will be coherent by the end...but no promises!  The good things is, I did takes notes while we were away this weekend because I knew when I finally got around to writing about it, things would get fuzzy.


After only being in the cabin only a few short minutes, I found myself already standing completely nude in the kitchen with orders from Daddy to find the paddle and wait for Him face down and spread eagle on the bed.

If you missed my post about that darn paddle, feel free to go back and read it here.

I couldn't even begin to contain the stupid grin all over my face as I ran off to dig through the luggage and assume my position on the bed while He started cooking dinner.  He finally came in and slowly walked around the bed, now with paddle in hand and reminding me that my head shouldn't be turned to the side.  Quickly, I turn it straight and buried my face in the mattress, bracing myself for what was to come. 

First, He started by warming me up with the rubber side of the paddle.  I don't know about you but I find comfort in keeping count in my head whenever He's spanking me, not sure why but it just helps keep me focused.  Somewhere around 50, He began using the stingy wooden side and it didn't take long before I started to loose count.  As each smack grew more intense, my feet started to pull up off the bed.  He fussed at me to lay me feet down and stay still.  The paddling went on, faster and faster until I was almost breathless and my ass was most definitely on fire.

Then, He ordered me to get up and come back into the kitchen.  He disappeared for a minute, putting the steaks on the grill, while I stood there somewhat in shock and a little unsure about what He wanted me to do next.  When He came back, He told me kneel on the hard wooden floor.  I could see the bulge in His pants and instinctively knew what this meant.  So after fumbling with the zipper, I was able to free His cock and began sucking, eagerly the way He expects

After a few minutes, He sent me back to the bed to resume the same position.  I cringed as I laid down, knowing there was more paddling coming my way.  This time when He was satisfied that my bottom was properly reddened, He gave me instructions to lay on the floor in the kitchen and masturbate while He continued to cook dinner.  I really tried to get into it but it was a bit hard with Him walking around and stepping over me.  I also couldn't stop thinking that I was on a strange floor...a floor that may or may not be cleaned like my own.  I tried not to notice but got a little creeped out by the dust bunnies and cobwebs under the cabinets.  Every few minutes, He would stop and just watch.  His voice was cold and stern, "you should be working yourself harder".

Eventually, I was sent back to the bed again.  This time, not only was I face down and spread eagle but He slid the Hitachi underneath me so that it was vibrating on my very swollen and sensitive clit  while He continued with the paddle.  I did say in my previous post that I had an assignment to edge myself 100 times in the week before we left, right?  Oh yeah...I was at the point where it didn't matter what side of the paddle He was spanking me with.  It was all feeling pretty good.
 
But when it seemed that I might be enjoying it too much, He stopped and sent me to retrieve the clover clamps from one of the many toy bags He packed. I found the clamps and hustled back to the kitchen.  With my hands clasped behind my head, He placed them on one nipple, then the other, and had me kneel and resume sucking.  

Just when I thought He was letting me up to take the clamps off, He bent me over the bar stool on the other side of the kitchen island so that my stomach was flat across the seat of the stool and my tits, along with the weight of the clamps dangled over the other side. This was a big ouchie but oh so worth it when I heard His pants fall completely to the floor and I felt Him push himself inside me from behind.  Pulling my head back with a fist full of my hair in one of his hands, He reached around with His other hand and grabbed the chain on the clamps and tugged in the opposite direction.  It hurt like hell, and I whined and whimpered, but He growled in my ear, "this is what you wanted isn't it?"

Yes, Daddy was all I could manage to squeak out but He knew I was loving it every minute of it. Being used in the middle of the kitchen, over a bar stool nonetheless, is not a luxury we are ever afforded at home!

And then...

Just like that...

He stopped...

Leaving me a...

But Dinner was ready!!

Anticipation

My tension had been mounting for a good couple weeks. Not surprising...but before leaving for our weekend, I had been on orgasm restriction yet again.  This time with explicit instructions to bring myself to the edge a total of 100 times during the last week before we were scheduled to leave.  I had dutifully completed this assignment, but found myself none too happy out it once I got past about 50. 

I was damn near a wreck.  It had been a terribly stressful couple weeks at work and I felt horrible, completely worn down, sick to my stomach, and every day battled horrible headaches.

It could have been that I really was fighting some type of illness, but oddly enough, I felt great once all the spankings and sex began.

Most likely, I just needed to recoup and recharge my batteries but I teased Daddy claiming that it must have been all the toxins building up in my body.  Seems like a rational explanation, right?

Anyways, Friday arrived and even though we were worried the little one's illness might throw a monkey wrench into the plans, she seemed a little better, so we decided to make a go of it and started packing.  I sat on the bed, almost in a stunned silence as I watched Him pack almost our entire arsenal of "stuff" into bag after bag. We were only going for less than 48 hours!

"Holy cow, what have I gotten myself into!?" went through my head more than once. 

We finally managed to get everything situated on the home front and set out on our drive to the mountains.  It was only about an hour away, but since neither of us felt that great, it was a pretty quiet ride.

As we turned onto the small gravel path, we were greeted by the cutest cabin nestled amongst the trees. 

We couldn't wait to get out and take a look around the place, not even bothering to unload the car just yet. We walked up to the porch and could hear faint music playing.  The key was in a lock box by the front door, so we retrieved it and into a perfectly romantic lit living room and music already playing in anticipation of our arrival.

It was like stepping into another world...one where nothing else mattered except the two of us.   

After we took a quick tour and unloaded the car, Daddy turned to me and said "Alright, you need to take off all your clothes.  In fact, from this point forward, as long as you are inside this cabin, you are to be naked".

And with that, I stood in front of Him, removed all my clothes, and...

Dr. Jekell and Mr. Hyde

Thankfully, we were able to enjoy our much needed weekend away.  Despite being on pins and needles, especially the first night and getting plenty of phone calls from home, the kiddos ultimately did just fine without us there.

It was a perfect weekend, equally balanced with plenty of kink, as well as romance.  But the one thing that remained constant throughout our entire trip was Daddy's use of the paddle.  The paddle isn't something He often gets an opportunity to use because it's SO loud.  Being that we were out in the woods in a cabin alone, He was going to make use of the noisiest toy He could find.  I mean, quiet spanking implements are fine, but I think for Daddy, there is just something extra satisfying about hearing it.  And WOW... did it echo really LOUDLY inside that cabin with nothing but wood all around us!!   

I was paddled first thing each morning.

I was paddled last thing before bed each night.

I was paddled when I was on top riding Him.

And every opportunity in between.

His goal was to keep my behind a nice shade of red at all times, and I certainly think He succeeded seeing as how most of the time I couldn't sit down very easily.     

Every paddling was given with me lying face down spread eagle on the bed.  Sometimes, He had me put pillows underneath my hips to arch my ass just a little higher, making that curve under my ass just that much more accessible.

God, how I came to love and hate this damn ping-pong paddle.

The rubber side was awesome!  With each lovely thunk, I was wishing He would never stop.  And even though He was using it at almost full force, it was really just a warm-up, or an occasional break from the other, much more painful, side. 
 

 

The other side, Daddy meticulously removed all of the orange foam padding, revealing only that thin layer of wood that lies in-between.  As much as I loved the rubber covered side, that's how much I hated this side.  There was no more thunk, just a very stingy pain each and every time it landed on my ass.  Mostly, He alternated between the two different textures during each paddling as I struggled to try and figure out His pattern.  Daddy loved seeing me squirm, trying so desperately to hold still.  Sometimes, all I could do was hold my breath and wait for it to end.

 
But what I loved most was looking up every time He was finished and seeing that raging hard-on! 

Not that it will happen now that we are home, back in the real-world, but we agreed that we could certainly get used to starting and ending each day like this!

    
 


 

Will It Happen?

The much awaited weekend is upon us.  

It's His birthday!

It's our anniversary!

Two days alone

A cabin in the woods...

As much fun as we can stand!!

Now we are wondering

Will it happen at all??

It's the day before

And wouldn't you know

There's a sick kid.

Please...oh please...let her be better by morning. 

Shocked and Horrified

I don't know what rock I was under last week but apparently I completely missed the news story about two young Amish sisters that went missing.  This morning, I woke up, logged onto my computer and stumbled across an article about the kidnapping of these two girls.

http://news.msn.com/crime-justice/prosecutor-couple-sexually-abused-2-amish-sisters?ocid=ansnews11

To my shock and horror, their kidnappers were allegedly in a Master/slave relationship.  WHAT?!  I couldn't believe what I was reading.  Well, that's not entirely true.  I actually can believe it because the world we live in can be cruel and the things that some people do to others is just abominable.

First off, what a pathetic excuse for human beings.  I think about what those poor girls must have gone through and then I think of my own daughters.  It just makes me SICK!.  Thankfully, the girls were released and are safely back home with their families, but in the blink of an eye, their lives are forever changed.  The mental scars they are left to deal with for the rest of their lives...all I can do is shake my head and pray that somehow, someway they get the help they are gong to need and are able to find a way to cope with this tragedy.

Next off, it's just another reason people believe that what we engage is isn't "normal".  The negative stigma surrounding our lifestyle will continue to be painted by the horrible acts of the few.  This guy is no Master...he's just a sick bastard. The general public will never hear about how most of us are good people, upstanding members of society even, living a normal existence just like everyone else, working good jobs and raising a family.  They won't hear about the positive aspects of our relationships because we have to hide who we are and what we do to avoid judgement and criticism.   

As far as the female accomplice in this being abused and a victim herself, well I have some of my own thoughts on that and maybe I should reserve judgement until it is determined her level of involvement.  But I tend to be a bit cynical and not trusting.

So I will leave it at this...slave or not, you know the difference between right and wrong!!

Well I think I ought to get off my soap box now. 

Feeling Human

Not that it's always easy, but submitting is my place of comfort.  I can appreciate how much peace it brings to our lives.   And maybe most importantly, it's what I realize now has always been a natural part of me.   

I also recognize that I am extreme people-pleaser.  I don't really believe that submission and being a people pleaser always go hand in hand, but I think for me they do.  The people-pleaser in me spends a huge amount of energy seeing to other people's happiness, whether that means taking care of them, doing for them, or biting my tongue to spare their feelings from what I am really thinking.  And that's fine...I like to see those I care about happy.

But in the past, I would do and do until I got to the point that it would become stressful and I would become resentful.  Out of frustration, I lashed out at the people closest to me.  I regret that I ever behaved like that but thankfully, the structure and rules we have in place now help to keep me grounded, and for the most part, make me face the day to day stresses without losing control of myself or at least help me find a more constructive way to deal with it. 

However, we probably all have our different struggles in submission and I think I have found mine.

Maybe I have just become more sensitive to it or maybe it's because I can't lash back but I really feel like there are times that I am now the target of their frustrations. I don't worry too much about the kids....that comes with the territory.  If you aren't making them mad from time to time, you probably aren't doing your job:) 

But when it's Daddy's frustrations, it really bothers me.  So, to keep from saying something I might regret, I push away.  I tell myself it's to give him space, to sort out what's really bothering him, but then I get into my own head and sometimes get stuck there with my emotions running amok.

Today has been one of those days.  I ended up just getting out of the house for a little while and heard a song on the radio that really summed up how I was feeling.  

"Human" by Christina Perri

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/christinaperri/human.html

I can hold my breath
I can bite my tongue
I can stay awake for days
If that's what you want
Be your number one

I can fake a smile
I can force a laugh
I can dance and play the part
If that's what you ask
Give you all I am
...

I can take so much
'Til I've had enough

But I'm only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I'm only human
And I crash and I break down
Your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart
'Cause I'm only human

  

Maintenance with a Cane

Sitting here on my deeply sore behind,

I have to admit, I'm not much of a fan!

Nope...not one little bit!!

Sparks Fly: A Post By Heron

Bound. Helpless. You wait for me.

As the neon crackles to life, your eyes widen.

Is it in fear? Anticipation? Perhaps a little of both?

Tracing your curves, I run the glass along your flesh.

You gasp as the static torments your body.

Sparks fly.

One moment you are moaning in agony, the next in ecstasy.

Your breast rise and fall as your breath quickens.

Again the glass strokes your flesh, grazing a nipple, your stomach, your back.

One moment you pull away, the next you strain forward eagerly awaiting.

Again the wand hums. Louder this time.

Sparks fly.

You slump forward as I give you a moment to recover.

Only this time, I am one with the wand.

I am the conduit.

I stroke you with my hands or brush you with my fingertips.

Finally I touch that spot that desperately needs caressing.

Static arcs from me, tormenting your flesh.

You scream.

Sparks fly.

Later, when you are safely tucked into bed I pull you close to me.

I softly smooth the the hair back from your face.

Leaning closer, I brush your lips with mine.

Our eyes lock.

Sparks fly.

If The Trees Could Talk

The task had been set for weeks. No longer could I wrestle with the conflicted emotions in my head.

Today had to be the day.

No more stalling...

No more waiting and hoping He might change His mind.

Though this task was not something completely foreign to me, this time would be different.

This task would push the limits of my exhibitionism. 


At first, I can only hear the sound of my heartbeat thumping wildly in my ears. Despite the fear clutching in my chest, I slowly remove all my clothes and stand completely exposed amongst the trees.

Then, off in the distance, I hear the soothing roll of thunder.

I begin to focus on the rustle of leaves dancing in the wind.

I try to relax, savoring the feel of a warm summer breeze caressing every inch of my skin.

Crouched down and leaning back against the rough bark of a pine tree, I touch myself, just one of the parts of me that is yours.

Even though my mind is still on alert, still somewhat worried that someone might see, my body is already on the edge.

As I get closer, I can focus only on you and my all consuming need.

My desperate need to do what pleases you, because in the end, that's the only thing that matters..  

You may not be close enough to hear but I whisper into the wind, "Daddy, may I please".

Wipeout

Now, I have an idea of how I picture my service.  It's probably a bit unrealistic but I would love to be that graceful and elegant slave who is flawless in her service.  I want to be the woman who is collected and poised in all that she does, always the image of perfection representing her Master well in all situations.

The other night around dusk, Daddy and I were out jogging and came across a couple of deer on the trail we were on. It's not uncommon in our little corner of suburbia for deer to be out freely roaming in and around our neighborhood. These creatures are stunning and I am amazed by their grace and beauty each and every time I see them walking through the woods.  

They noticed us and bounded deeper into the woods then stopped, keeping a close eye on us as we passed by.  I commented to Daddy about how I wish I could be as graceful as these beautiful animals.
He said, "I think you are".

I laughed and asked, "Have you so quickly forgotten about the incident on the beach?...a moment you said you would never forget!"
 
So, let me back up a little bit.  We were out walking one morning on the beach and came across a little ravine in the sand that we could either hop across or detour around.  Honestly, I am vertically challenged so for me it would have been considered a jump.  Plus, knowing my tendency to be clumsy, I opted for the detour.

Let it be known...this actually was a well thought out and conscious decision to prevent doing something that would embarrass myself and/or Daddy.  But as we continued on Daddy picked at me for being chicken so naturally when we came back by that same spot, I just had to prove Him wrong. 

I backed up a little, to get some speed and momentum, jogged a few steps then launched myself in the air.  Just as I reached the other side of this small ravine, my foot hit the edge, sank down and sent my body flying.  I came to a crash landing on my entire right side.  It all happened so quick and I was in shock and hurting so bad, but all I could do was lay there and laugh.

How...utterly... embarrassing!!!

Of course, He was laughing too and everyone around me was trying not to laugh as they walked by.  He claims it was one of the highlights of our trip!  Let's put it this way, I fell so hard that my shoulder and hip were sore for days!

So you can see, my grace doesn't come close to rivaling that of a deer.

And Daddy decided to clarify his statement..."Well you're graceful when it matters"  
 

 

Silence

Your hand grabs firmly around my throat.

So possessive and intoxicating.

Your voice tells me not a sound should escape my lips.

So powerful and seductive.

In the silence, the beast takes what is His.

In the silence, my body is on fire, but without a voice, how can I seek permission?

Your needs and desires...that's my purpose.

So I submit to this fate.

Your voice then commands me to let go, still not a sound should escape my lips.

In the silence, every touch is like electricity moving between us.

In the silence, I can only scream inside my own head as you extinguish the flames that consume me.  

continued from Just the Two of Us

Bittersweet

Sorry for the completely vanilla post but today was such an emotional day for me. Today was the beginning of yet another school year and were milestone days for each of my girls. 

The oldest...well it was the first day of her senior year.  It seems like just a few months ago, she was my little baby.  Daddy and I ask each other all the time "how is it that she is SO grown up?".  And she looked so pretty this morning!  I complimented her and asked "why are you so dressed up?". She said "well mom, today is my last first day of school and I wanted to look nice".  All through the day, I thought about what she said and kept getting choked up.  Darn it...I'm even doing it now just trying to write this post.

The youngest (my little hot-headed fashionista that thinks I am a complete embarrassment to all man-kind)...this was her last first day of elementary school.  I feels like my heart is completely breaking as I watch her childhood, and all it's sweet innocence, slipping right through my fingers.

I'm not a perfect mother, not even close, but I know how much I love them and I can only hope one day they understand just how proud they made me each and every day. 

Hidden Treasures

Today was another beautiful day on the lake.  Daddy caught plenty of fish and well...I just sat around in another one of my bikinis, eating like I had a tapeworm.  I don't know what it is about being out there, maybe it's the fresh air that makes me so hungry but I just can't help myself. 

This is becoming quite a regular habit on the weekends for us I suppose.  We enjoy it though.  Time spent in the peace and quiet is priceless. 

Today we went up into the mouth of a certain river and stumbled upon an amazing old looking dredge.  I was thinking...that would make a great photo backdrop and before the words came out of my mouth, He said the exact thing I was thinking.  It is almost too weird how much alike we are beginning to think! 

Anyways, He motored over to the dredge and nonchalantly looked around for a few minutes to make sure we were really alone. He finally pulled up beside it and I scooted off our boat, onto the dredge. Quickly, I posed for some pictures, hopped back on our boat and we went on our way.

 

 
After we got home, I was getting ready to shower and Daddy happened upon the long forgotten cane that had been tucked away in our closet.  I think when I was vacuuming the other day, I must have knocked it over, so it was lying where He could see it. 

You should have seen the look in His eyes and the joy in His voice.  He was a like a kid that just unwrapped a Christmas present.  

Today, we were up to a count of 16 in daily maintenance spankings, and I guess you can imagine what He couldn't wait to use!!