Don't know how many of you reading this are down here in the South, but we are on our second round of snow in just as many days. Thankfully, school was already cancelled and I was released early from work so there wasn't a repeat of last year's nightmare with people stranded all over the city but I didn't feel completed at ease until Heron was able to leave work and join us here at home.
Unfortunately, I am nursing yet another cold. This one, thanks to Heron. It's the gift that just keeps giving! So, hopefully I can keep this post on track despite my stuffy head.
Anyways, on to other things...
I want to thank DtBHC for his honesty in the following comment on my last post, Saddle Sore. I'm sure it's quite possible other people have had similar thoughts and after starting to type out a long reply, I thought perhaps it was better to just create a post.
Hi lg, I sometimes want to ask you the same question. Not judging in any
way but trying to understand your journey and what motivates you to
further your submission. Reading your posts triggers some strong
feelings which I find difficult to process. I'm sure that I would fail
if I was to be taken down this path. It's not likely to ever happen but I
am fascinated by your journey.
Without knowing exactly which part triggers these strong feelings, I am going to try my best to explain my journey and what motivates me to further my submission. Feel free to elaborate if I have made any wrong assumptions in the direction your comment.
First of all, I am a consensual slave. I made a commitment to do as He asks, whenever and wherever. Of course, this takes a huge amount of trust to know that while pushing my boundaries, He will never push me farther than I can handle. He has spent years learning my body and my body signals, and He knows exactly where my physical and mental threshold is. He also understands that this threshold changes based on my hormones, stress, fatigue, and any numerous other outside influences.
In His vision of M/s, my purpose and focus should be ensuring His pleasure. He is not, in turn, required to ensure mine. My pleasure comes in serving Him. He sometimes plans scenes that are specifically geared towards enforcing this very principle. And I emphasize that this is "His vision" of M/s because everyone has their own way, none of which we believe are right or wrong
In the beginning, our dynamic was very much a punishment based system. I was trained to serve Him in the ways that He expected and failure was met with a very swift negative reinforcement. I get that some people don't like the idea of this. But it's what worked for us. I admit, it was what was needed to break so many of my disrespectful habits and years of conditioning. And yes, I tried harder because I feared failure and punishment.
Eventually, as I grew in my submission and transitioned from the mindset of "what will I get our of this", He transitioned to more of a positive reinforcement dynamic and that's when I truly began to thrive. Fear of failure no longer drove me to improve in my service. Wanting to please Him did.
However, I admit, there are times when I have trouble processing things. Usually it is only when my desires and expectations are getting the better of me. It's something I continue to work on. In fact, the morning that I cried all the way to work was the morning after the horse and extra long cock worship session. In that moment, I felt like how much more can I give?
So yeah...if I feel like this on occasion, that probably comes out in my writing when I am recounting a scene. And questions like "what motivates you in you submission"...I've had to ask myself frequently.
I'm not a masochist so it's not about getting off on pain.
And I am quite frankly denied sex quite a bit so it can't be about the sex.
The simple answer is and the one that applies probably 90% of the time is that I have found so much love and contentment in serving Him.
It took me a long time to get to that point though. I had always loved serving Him outside the bedroom. It was in the bedroom I had major control issues and feared His sexual appetite, but mostly I feared His sadistic needs. For years, I forced His desires into an imaginary closet. To top it off, I worked pretty damn hard to make Him feel like a freak for having such needs. He loved me despite it all but it was obvious neither of us was completely happy or fulfilled.
Our journey has been filled with plenty of bumps and bends in the road and I have failed more times than I can count. But I've learned that this journey isn't about successes or failures. This journey is about staying engaged and in tune with each other, always trying to give the other our best. I don't always enjoy what He chooses to do to me (or not do to me) but it was trust and respect that allowed me to give myself over to Him and it's what allows me to continue doing so. Trust is also what helped created a completely different energy and connection in our marriage.
Overall, I think by living within the confines of His expectations, I have become a better person. Patience is definitely having to become one of my virtues. And I think it's made Him a stronger, more confident person.
So what keeps me motivated the other 10% of the time that I don't find my cup running over with happiness just doing what I am supposed to be doing? Well, then it's just a matter of being obedient.
Again, thank you for you thoughts and comment DtBHC! I'm glad to know that my journey fascinates you:)
Wednesday, February 25, 2015
Monday, February 23, 2015
Saddle Sore
Why the hell do I let you do this to me?
This might have just come out of my mouth at least once during the fifteen or so minutes I spent on the horse. I assure you...a lot worse wasn't said!
Desperately, I tried not to move a muscle. I closed my eyes, breathing through the pain. Which doesn't get more bearable as you sit there, mind you. It aches and aches and only gets worse.
So let's go back to how it all started that night last week...
After dinner, while He was upstairs, I knelt at His feet, as I do quite often when He is playing a video game. Most of the time, He continues playing but this time He turned the game off and told me to get undressed.
I knew it was time and I wanted to run and hide.
Walking to the closet, He took out the horse and set it in the middle of the room. Being that I am pretty short, He had to get a chair so that I could reach high enough to throw one of my legs over. Very carefully, I lowered myself down until the wooden V shaped edge of the horse was most definitely rammed up between my legs and was supporting nearly my full body weight Truth be told, my inner thighs were locked against the sides, trying to take some of the load.
As I sat there, He walked around the horse, putting on my ankle and wrist cuffs. He attached rope to each of the cuffs, then tied the ropes from my left side of my body to the bedroom door knob several feet away to my left. The ropes on the right arm and leg were tied to the foot board of the bed, also several feet away but to the right.
My arms were completely outstretched, while my legs were not pulled tight, but just enough that it took away my ability to use my leg muscles to ease the pressure.
It was already almost more than I could bare as I watched Him walking back over to me, this time with the clover clamps in His hands. I couldn't imagine that pain on top of the other pain. It's not often that I beg but this time I sure did. Of course it didn't work. I think my pleas only served to fuel His sadistic fire.
At this point, I had easily already been on the horse for close to ten minutes. Standing back and taking in the sight of my helpless body, He grinned and commented about how great I looked. Ha....I didn't feel great. Then, He walked over in my direct line of sight and got on the treadmill.
Now, I expected the pain to be intense. But what I didn't expect was how badly it would hurt in my butt crack!! I couldn't move even a fraction of an inch without the pain being excruciating. At least if I stayed motionless, the pain was more of a deep ache but it was impossible to relieve no matter how I tried to shift. If I tried to rock ever so slightly forward, the pain on my clit was blinding. So, I chose the lesser of two evils in my opinion and kept the pressure more focused on my back side.
He only stayed on the treadmill a few minutes. So, all in all, I was on the horse probably no more than fifteen minutes, but it was more than enough to know that it will never make my list of favorites. It IS a torture device for a reason!
I've read stories of women riding it for close to AN HOUR and I'm sure the goal will be for me to spend longer and longer on it. But I can't even imagine, because after experiencing only fifteen minutes...that little bone in my backside (the one extends down between your checks and divides your body in half) was still sore three days later!!!
It was so sweet and caring the way He lifted me off the horse and cradled my aching body, until my shaky feet stood firmly on the floor. I only wish I could say this was the point that He forced Himself on me, making mad passionate love to me, or hell, even forced my head down on His cock.
But that is not the case. Instead, I found myself kneeling beside the treadmill with a rope attached to the clovers. As He continued on walking, He held onto the rope, tugging my nipples with each stride.
And we won't bother to talk about the hour and a half cock worship after that.
Let's just say, I was thankful for sleep, even if I did go without.
This might have just come out of my mouth at least once during the fifteen or so minutes I spent on the horse. I assure you...a lot worse wasn't said!
Desperately, I tried not to move a muscle. I closed my eyes, breathing through the pain. Which doesn't get more bearable as you sit there, mind you. It aches and aches and only gets worse.
So let's go back to how it all started that night last week...
After dinner, while He was upstairs, I knelt at His feet, as I do quite often when He is playing a video game. Most of the time, He continues playing but this time He turned the game off and told me to get undressed.
I knew it was time and I wanted to run and hide.
Walking to the closet, He took out the horse and set it in the middle of the room. Being that I am pretty short, He had to get a chair so that I could reach high enough to throw one of my legs over. Very carefully, I lowered myself down until the wooden V shaped edge of the horse was most definitely rammed up between my legs and was supporting nearly my full body weight Truth be told, my inner thighs were locked against the sides, trying to take some of the load.
As I sat there, He walked around the horse, putting on my ankle and wrist cuffs. He attached rope to each of the cuffs, then tied the ropes from my left side of my body to the bedroom door knob several feet away to my left. The ropes on the right arm and leg were tied to the foot board of the bed, also several feet away but to the right.
My arms were completely outstretched, while my legs were not pulled tight, but just enough that it took away my ability to use my leg muscles to ease the pressure.
It was already almost more than I could bare as I watched Him walking back over to me, this time with the clover clamps in His hands. I couldn't imagine that pain on top of the other pain. It's not often that I beg but this time I sure did. Of course it didn't work. I think my pleas only served to fuel His sadistic fire.
At this point, I had easily already been on the horse for close to ten minutes. Standing back and taking in the sight of my helpless body, He grinned and commented about how great I looked. Ha....I didn't feel great. Then, He walked over in my direct line of sight and got on the treadmill.
Now, I expected the pain to be intense. But what I didn't expect was how badly it would hurt in my butt crack!! I couldn't move even a fraction of an inch without the pain being excruciating. At least if I stayed motionless, the pain was more of a deep ache but it was impossible to relieve no matter how I tried to shift. If I tried to rock ever so slightly forward, the pain on my clit was blinding. So, I chose the lesser of two evils in my opinion and kept the pressure more focused on my back side.
He only stayed on the treadmill a few minutes. So, all in all, I was on the horse probably no more than fifteen minutes, but it was more than enough to know that it will never make my list of favorites. It IS a torture device for a reason!
I've read stories of women riding it for close to AN HOUR and I'm sure the goal will be for me to spend longer and longer on it. But I can't even imagine, because after experiencing only fifteen minutes...that little bone in my backside (the one extends down between your checks and divides your body in half) was still sore three days later!!!
It was so sweet and caring the way He lifted me off the horse and cradled my aching body, until my shaky feet stood firmly on the floor. I only wish I could say this was the point that He forced Himself on me, making mad passionate love to me, or hell, even forced my head down on His cock.
But that is not the case. Instead, I found myself kneeling beside the treadmill with a rope attached to the clovers. As He continued on walking, He held onto the rope, tugging my nipples with each stride.
And we won't bother to talk about the hour and a half cock worship after that.
Let's just say, I was thankful for sleep, even if I did go without.
Sunday, February 22, 2015
Evolving! Changing the Title
Something I have thought about for quite some time now has been changing the title of my blog. But it worried me to make that drastic of a change. Sometimes it's just easier to stay with what you know...and what everyone else knows.
But I think ultimately, to be true to myself, I want to change. Of course I talked it over first with Heron to get His permission. I think He was a bit confused as to why I felt so strongly about it and I explained that Master's Submissive Little Girl is really something I came up with on a whim very early on in our journey. We have both changed, evolved in each of our roles and as a couple. And I think this representation of me, should evolve as well.
I definitely wanted something that included the name I was given on the day He collared me. For those of you that might not have read that post, feel free to go back here.
He thought about it for a minute and suggested Songs From a Nÿghtbird (changing the spelling as to lessen the confusion with song lyrics or band names). I loved it but also felt it should reflect that I belong to Him so I suggested Songs From His Nÿghtbird. And thus my new blog title was born.
I'm sure it will take some getting used to but my web address will remain the same, as well as my screen name. So hopefully, there won't be too much confusion there.
So, thank you to everyone who reads here. Whether you make yourself known through messages or comments or you choose to quietly observe, you all make an impact in my life. My journey thus far, wouldn't have been quite the same without the support of all of you and for that, I am grateful.
I hope you all enjoy the changes coming soon!!
Friday, February 20, 2015
Gratitude
I hate to admit this but yesterday was one of those days. We've had more intense play than usual, so I assume maybe it was a bit of drop, possibly mixed with something Heron said the night before that left me a little unsettled. After crying all the way to work, I drifted through the better portion of my day trying to process what was going on, but ended up more and more off track.
The last time I felt like this, He was understanding but also quick to remind me "remember, this isn't about you at all."
As harsh as this sounded at the time, it was true. I gave myself to Him completely, and with that, I also had to give up certain ways of thinking. But from time to time, it just doesn't seem that simple.
His words echoed in my head all day long but failed to bring any comfort and did nothing to cease the insanity building in my mind.
After getting home from work, I set to cooking dinner. I like to set up my laptop by the stove so I can easily view my recipes and catch up on blogs if I get a chance. Now, I've been following a blog recently, Serving As Nature Intended. A reader here on my blog actually turned me to slave kate's blog when I began talking about the wooden horse. Even though, our situations are very different, I have to say, Her words inspire and humble me. She carries herself with such an eloquence but is also extremely open and honest. And if I could only live up to be a tenth of the slave that she is...well, I would be pretty blessed.
I don't know why, but I decided to explore her web page a little further than usual and clicked the link to her book. Reading through the bit that is available on Amazon, I came to a word that stopped me in my tracks.
GRATITUDE.
Such a key principle, and I had lost sight of it. Almost immediately, a peace of mind washed over me. It's amazing what just the right words will do, at just the right time! So, thank you slave kate.
These are just a few things I found to be grateful for...
...the beautiful sunrise on my way to work, because it means I am alive.
...my health, because it means that I can serve to the best of my ability
...the ability to submit my body for His use, even if that means enduring pain for His pleasure.
...any pleasure He allows me, or denies me (still working on the being grateful for denial part)
...His praise, compassion, leadership, discipline, and guidance.
...knowing that in every breath I take, I have His unwavering and unconditional love.
...and I'm even grateful for the wooden horse (eh...that part may be pushing it!)
The last time I felt like this, He was understanding but also quick to remind me "remember, this isn't about you at all."
As harsh as this sounded at the time, it was true. I gave myself to Him completely, and with that, I also had to give up certain ways of thinking. But from time to time, it just doesn't seem that simple.
His words echoed in my head all day long but failed to bring any comfort and did nothing to cease the insanity building in my mind.
After getting home from work, I set to cooking dinner. I like to set up my laptop by the stove so I can easily view my recipes and catch up on blogs if I get a chance. Now, I've been following a blog recently, Serving As Nature Intended. A reader here on my blog actually turned me to slave kate's blog when I began talking about the wooden horse. Even though, our situations are very different, I have to say, Her words inspire and humble me. She carries herself with such an eloquence but is also extremely open and honest. And if I could only live up to be a tenth of the slave that she is...well, I would be pretty blessed.
I don't know why, but I decided to explore her web page a little further than usual and clicked the link to her book. Reading through the bit that is available on Amazon, I came to a word that stopped me in my tracks.
GRATITUDE.
Such a key principle, and I had lost sight of it. Almost immediately, a peace of mind washed over me. It's amazing what just the right words will do, at just the right time! So, thank you slave kate.
These are just a few things I found to be grateful for...
...the beautiful sunrise on my way to work, because it means I am alive.
...my health, because it means that I can serve to the best of my ability
...the ability to submit my body for His use, even if that means enduring pain for His pleasure.
...any pleasure He allows me, or denies me (still working on the being grateful for denial part)
...His praise, compassion, leadership, discipline, and guidance.
...knowing that in every breath I take, I have His unwavering and unconditional love.
...and I'm even grateful for the wooden horse (eh...that part may be pushing it!)
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
Where it Feels Right
There was a time, I swore to kneel for no man.
And though it seemed awkward at first,
eventually I knelt for you.
eventually I knelt for you.
Now, I come often and quite willingly,
to kneel beside your chair, sometimes resting my head on your leg,
to kneel beside your chair, sometimes resting my head on your leg,
Not only does it drown out the chaos,
but nothing else in the world feels so natural.
but nothing else in the world feels so natural.
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Burning Bright
You permanently opened a door into my soul...
And ignited a fire in my mind and body that will never cease to burn.
I'm yours forever and always...
"He did not know that when the erotic and the tender are mixed in a woman, they form a powerful bond, almost a fixation" - excerpt from Delta of Venus by Anais Nin
Sunday, February 15, 2015
Wouldn't Change a Thing
Continued from By Candlelight...
After a lovely dessert, I stood in the middle of the bedroom, my ankles were bound tightly together and my wrists were secured behind my back. The tower stood ominously over me as rope dangled down from either side of the bar up above my head. Clover clamps bit down angrily on my nipples, as Heron tied one end of the rope to the chain dangling between my breasts. The other end of the rope was then connected to a weight laid on the floor.
He continued hoisting and shortening the rope, drawing the clamps into an upside down V, until I had no choice but to stand on my tippy toes. Cold sweat covered my body and even the slightest of movements brought fresh waves of pain through my nipples.
After standing and watching my near motionless struggle for a couple of minutes, He grabbed a magazine and took a seat several feet away. Trying to remain focused on my breathing, the fire in my calves grew and soon burned greater than the fire in my nipples. He seemed only mildly interested in the fact that my legs were beginning to shake and I was teetering in place.
Thinking that my body couldn't be pulled any more taunt that it already was, I watched as He set the magazine down and nonchalantly walked over and stood beside me. First, He kicked at the weight pushing it several more inches away and then blinding white pain shot through me as He shortened the rope even more. Struggling to stand even higher on my toes, I know that I whimpered, and yelped, and begged for Him to stop. Everything else got kind of fuzzy until the clamps came off and the astronomical pain brought me back to the here and now.
Now, tied spread eagle on the bed, the throbbing, aching pain still radiated through my nipples giving the feeling that were still clamped.. I was just glad to be lying down though. The fatigue had really begun to set in, but I kept on, wanting to endure for Him.
It had been so long since I had felt our bodies connect, I secretly hoped this was the point in the evening that He would finally take me. But instead, I felt the pinch of my labia being clamped and pulled open. Gasping as I laid completely open, there was an odd mix of excitement, embarrassment, and vulnerability in feeling so exposed.
But quickly, any inhibitions I had were driven away as He forced one orgasm after another from me for nearly an hour. Eventually the clamps slid off my lips, but He continued working me with the Hitachi and dildo until I was too far gone to even realize I was saying "things". Usually words do not escape my lips, even in fits of passion unless He is prompting some kind of response. But that wasn't the case this time...or so I'm told. Some things were merely unintelligible mumblings, while some things were quite clear. Never hearing me lose myself in such a way, He thought it was about the hottest thing He'd ever experienced.
Sore and completely spent, He simply held me and brought me back from whatever place I had been. As I drifted off to sleep, I couldn't help but accept that while the night hadn't been at all what I thought it was going to be, it was still a great night!
After a lovely dessert, I stood in the middle of the bedroom, my ankles were bound tightly together and my wrists were secured behind my back. The tower stood ominously over me as rope dangled down from either side of the bar up above my head. Clover clamps bit down angrily on my nipples, as Heron tied one end of the rope to the chain dangling between my breasts. The other end of the rope was then connected to a weight laid on the floor.
He continued hoisting and shortening the rope, drawing the clamps into an upside down V, until I had no choice but to stand on my tippy toes. Cold sweat covered my body and even the slightest of movements brought fresh waves of pain through my nipples.
After standing and watching my near motionless struggle for a couple of minutes, He grabbed a magazine and took a seat several feet away. Trying to remain focused on my breathing, the fire in my calves grew and soon burned greater than the fire in my nipples. He seemed only mildly interested in the fact that my legs were beginning to shake and I was teetering in place.
Thinking that my body couldn't be pulled any more taunt that it already was, I watched as He set the magazine down and nonchalantly walked over and stood beside me. First, He kicked at the weight pushing it several more inches away and then blinding white pain shot through me as He shortened the rope even more. Struggling to stand even higher on my toes, I know that I whimpered, and yelped, and begged for Him to stop. Everything else got kind of fuzzy until the clamps came off and the astronomical pain brought me back to the here and now.
Now, tied spread eagle on the bed, the throbbing, aching pain still radiated through my nipples giving the feeling that were still clamped.. I was just glad to be lying down though. The fatigue had really begun to set in, but I kept on, wanting to endure for Him.
It had been so long since I had felt our bodies connect, I secretly hoped this was the point in the evening that He would finally take me. But instead, I felt the pinch of my labia being clamped and pulled open. Gasping as I laid completely open, there was an odd mix of excitement, embarrassment, and vulnerability in feeling so exposed.
But quickly, any inhibitions I had were driven away as He forced one orgasm after another from me for nearly an hour. Eventually the clamps slid off my lips, but He continued working me with the Hitachi and dildo until I was too far gone to even realize I was saying "things". Usually words do not escape my lips, even in fits of passion unless He is prompting some kind of response. But that wasn't the case this time...or so I'm told. Some things were merely unintelligible mumblings, while some things were quite clear. Never hearing me lose myself in such a way, He thought it was about the hottest thing He'd ever experienced.
Sore and completely spent, He simply held me and brought me back from whatever place I had been. As I drifted off to sleep, I couldn't help but accept that while the night hadn't been at all what I thought it was going to be, it was still a great night!
Saturday, February 14, 2015
He Didn't Forget
It was a relief when Heron decided to go with me rather than sending me alone, but walking through Home Depot to the lumber aisle, I could feel the flush in my cheeks and the twinge of fear and excitement.
Obviously, no one could imagine what He was actually going to do with the the wood...or could they?!
The moral of this story...He didn't forget.
Which means I am really going to ride a wooden horse, as scary as that is.
The fact is, it's already been made. At least His first version of it
Now all I can do is wait.
Obviously, no one could imagine what He was actually going to do with the the wood...or could they?!
The moral of this story...He didn't forget.
Which means I am really going to ride a wooden horse, as scary as that is.
The fact is, it's already been made. At least His first version of it
Now all I can do is wait.
Thursday, February 12, 2015
Vegas Baby!!
Today, I am going interrupt our regularly scheduled broadcast. For those of you sitting on the edge of your seat waiting for installment 3 from my Saturday exploits...I apologize for making you wait.
Awww...what am I saying? A little suspense never hurt anyone:)
So, this year, Heron and I will be celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary. Who would have thunk it?
Well, not even me if you had asked about 15 years ago. Whew...those early years were rough!!
During the 22 years we have been together, we have seen some of the happiest times in our life and faced some of the worst. But we've done it together and I couldn't imagine facing life with anyone else in this whole world.
Ok...sorry to get all side tracked with the mush. It is close to Valentine's after all.
We are hoping to plan our adult only anniversary trip to Sin City, possibly this summer!! As we have never been to Vegas before, we've already done a bit of research but I was hoping to maybe get a little advice from you all, my lovely readers.
And while we aren't much for gambling, I hear there is still plenty to see and do (besides me of course-haha)
So what do you say? Any recommendations on where to stay? Good restaurants? Things to do (kinky or not kinky)?
Awww...what am I saying? A little suspense never hurt anyone:)
So, this year, Heron and I will be celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary. Who would have thunk it?
Well, not even me if you had asked about 15 years ago. Whew...those early years were rough!!
During the 22 years we have been together, we have seen some of the happiest times in our life and faced some of the worst. But we've done it together and I couldn't imagine facing life with anyone else in this whole world.
Ok...sorry to get all side tracked with the mush. It is close to Valentine's after all.
We are hoping to plan our adult only anniversary trip to Sin City, possibly this summer!! As we have never been to Vegas before, we've already done a bit of research but I was hoping to maybe get a little advice from you all, my lovely readers.
And while we aren't much for gambling, I hear there is still plenty to see and do (besides me of course-haha)
So what do you say? Any recommendations on where to stay? Good restaurants? Things to do (kinky or not kinky)?
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
By Candlelight
Continued from Riding the Rope...
Now it was becoming clear why Heron hadn't eaten earlier.
He disappeared downstairs for a moment and returned with his dinner, setting it down in the dresser. The tower and chair had been removed from the center of our bedroom and was replaced with the massage table, covered by a table cloth. He helped me up onto it and cradled my head lovingly as I laid flat on my back. As He walked around tying my arms and legs down to the corners of the table, He explained that tonight, I would be His table.
Now, I've heard of people being used as furniture before and had silently wondered what it would be like. Would it be hot, humiliating, maybe a bit both? However, I guess in this situation, I would be considered more the place mat than the table, but it was erotic nonetheless and didn't seem humiliating at all.
He carefully laid the plate on my stomach and the salad bowl on my pelvis. What He did next, I could have never imagined in a million years. He flicked off the light, stood over me lighting a candle, and told me He intended to eat His dinner by candlelight. And I was going to be the candle holder. Before I had a chance to think ir say anything, He placed it in my mouth, almost touching my throat. I bit down slightly holding onto it ever so slightly with my teeth. My lips closed and locked around it, to ensure it was firmly in place.
I laid perfectly still, focusing only on the flickering light dancing above my head, and the sound of Him starting to eat. After finishing His salad, He placed the Hitachi on the table in between my legs and proceeded on to the main course. As He ate, He would reach down intermittently and turned the vibrator on and off, just to make my predicament a little more "exciting".
Being used in such a way was incredibly hot and I was so close to the edge of orgasm, but I didn't dare for fear that I might lose control of the candle. Not to mention I didn't have permission. And with my mouth full, couldn't have asked anyways.
I continued watching the warm glow and began worrying when I saw the wax liquifying and teetering on the top of the pillar. In the end, despite my best efforts, one lone drip made it's way down to my lips and trailed ever so slightly across my cheek. He could tell by my reaction, it was hot so He quickly blew it out, checked to make sure I was alright, and then resumed eating.
When He finished, He stood beside me, picking the dried wax from my cheek and complimented me for being such a brave girl. Wow! That was like hearing "good girl" times 10.
Now, I knew there were several ways that the whole scene could have gone terribly wrong. But I completely trusted that He would keep me safe and it made me so proud to have stayed calm and pleased Him enough to earn such sweet praise.
After helping me up off the table, He told me to put on my robe and we went downstairs and was treated to a yummy bowl of cake and ice cream. We relaxed for a little bit before heading back upstairs for the next round.
Just some words of caution if you ever engage in this type of play...no hairspray, no perfume or cologne, and never leave your partner unattended even for a second. And truth be told, if Heron had it to do over again, He would have used a drip guard at the base of the candle or used a drip-less candle. We were lucky in that the drip didn't burn me but it was a lesson learned. And while we both enjoy wax play, it's better to be safe than sorry around the face.
Now it was becoming clear why Heron hadn't eaten earlier.
He disappeared downstairs for a moment and returned with his dinner, setting it down in the dresser. The tower and chair had been removed from the center of our bedroom and was replaced with the massage table, covered by a table cloth. He helped me up onto it and cradled my head lovingly as I laid flat on my back. As He walked around tying my arms and legs down to the corners of the table, He explained that tonight, I would be His table.
Now, I've heard of people being used as furniture before and had silently wondered what it would be like. Would it be hot, humiliating, maybe a bit both? However, I guess in this situation, I would be considered more the place mat than the table, but it was erotic nonetheless and didn't seem humiliating at all.
He carefully laid the plate on my stomach and the salad bowl on my pelvis. What He did next, I could have never imagined in a million years. He flicked off the light, stood over me lighting a candle, and told me He intended to eat His dinner by candlelight. And I was going to be the candle holder. Before I had a chance to think ir say anything, He placed it in my mouth, almost touching my throat. I bit down slightly holding onto it ever so slightly with my teeth. My lips closed and locked around it, to ensure it was firmly in place.
I laid perfectly still, focusing only on the flickering light dancing above my head, and the sound of Him starting to eat. After finishing His salad, He placed the Hitachi on the table in between my legs and proceeded on to the main course. As He ate, He would reach down intermittently and turned the vibrator on and off, just to make my predicament a little more "exciting".
Being used in such a way was incredibly hot and I was so close to the edge of orgasm, but I didn't dare for fear that I might lose control of the candle. Not to mention I didn't have permission. And with my mouth full, couldn't have asked anyways.
I continued watching the warm glow and began worrying when I saw the wax liquifying and teetering on the top of the pillar. In the end, despite my best efforts, one lone drip made it's way down to my lips and trailed ever so slightly across my cheek. He could tell by my reaction, it was hot so He quickly blew it out, checked to make sure I was alright, and then resumed eating.
When He finished, He stood beside me, picking the dried wax from my cheek and complimented me for being such a brave girl. Wow! That was like hearing "good girl" times 10.
Now, I knew there were several ways that the whole scene could have gone terribly wrong. But I completely trusted that He would keep me safe and it made me so proud to have stayed calm and pleased Him enough to earn such sweet praise.
After helping me up off the table, He told me to put on my robe and we went downstairs and was treated to a yummy bowl of cake and ice cream. We relaxed for a little bit before heading back upstairs for the next round.
Just some words of caution if you ever engage in this type of play...no hairspray, no perfume or cologne, and never leave your partner unattended even for a second. And truth be told, if Heron had it to do over again, He would have used a drip guard at the base of the candle or used a drip-less candle. We were lucky in that the drip didn't burn me but it was a lesson learned. And while we both enjoy wax play, it's better to be safe than sorry around the face.
Monday, February 9, 2015
Riding the Rope
The kinky play this weekend was plentiful, that's for sure. Heron is obviously making up for lost time. I don't know when I might finish this post, but right now, it's Sunday and my body feels like a battlefield. In a good way of course. And my mind, well it's blissfully quiet.
You can read about Friday's adventure in Pulled in All Directions. Saturday, well, that's what I intend to try and describe in this post. Maybe the next 2 or 3 posts actually. And then, there's whatever He's planning for tonight.
HOLY COW!! A girl can only handle so much:)
Nothing so far, has been so intense that I couldn't handle it. A bit painful at times but yesterday was long, like several scenes over several hours long. So, I'm feeling it everywhere today.
The night started with Heron cooking a wonderful dinner. He said it would be necessary to keep up my strength. Buffalo steak, salad, and naan bread. A perfectly meal, not too light and not too heavy. I thought it odd that He wasn't eating though. I asked a couple of times and He just told me not to worry, He would eat later. So I shrugged it off thinking that maybe He didn't want to be working His domly magic on a full stomach.
After my food had settled, He took me upstairs and I removed my clothes. When I entered the bedroom, I saw the Power Tower in the center of the room with a chair underneath. I was tied up just like the picture below. Sometimes, He draws inspiration from photos and this photo just happened to be the inspiration for the first scene of the night.
Once I was all tied up, He hoisted the rope as tight as it would go between my legs. I can't even begin to describe how uncomfortable the coarse rope was nestled deeply between my folds and up my backside. Actually, nestled is too nice of a word...I think the more appropriate description would be that it was cutting my lower body in half!!
Picking up the leather strap, He walked over and stood in front of me with that big grin that both scares me and makes me melt all at the same time. He commented about how swollen my pussy already was and used the opportunity to slap it several times in rapid succession. But each time I flinched or tried to pull away, the rope only dug deeper.
Picking up the crop next, He flicked mostly at my tits and nipples and threw in a few strikes down below for good measure. But every so often, He would reach up and tighten the rope, each time forcing me higher on my toes in a fruitless attempt to retreat from the pain in between my legs.. Before long, I was writhing about, yelping and begging Him to stop.
"Predicaments", He just kept taunting.
Grabbing my hair and pulling my head back, He used the cane, bringing it down several times across the tops of my tits. Thankfully, He finally put the cane down but not before He turned His attention to my pussy and thighs, leaving me with a couple of bright red stripes.
There were several other implements, most of which I hated. But I have to admit, there was one I enjoyed, and that was the fillet knife. Instantly, my body flooded the rope with moisture. And this time when He pulled my head back, I was warned not to move an inch. As He whispered in my ear, the tip of the knife traced the curves of my body, slowly...carefully. My breathing slowed and deepened and I was quickly about as lost as I could ever get. Nothing mattered in that moment except the blade as it danced across the flesh of my neck...my chest...across my nipples.
After kissing me deeply, He set the knife down and freed me from my bonds. He told me to go to "my place". So, I laid down on my side of the bed, anxiously awaiting whatever He planned next.
You can read about Friday's adventure in Pulled in All Directions. Saturday, well, that's what I intend to try and describe in this post. Maybe the next 2 or 3 posts actually. And then, there's whatever He's planning for tonight.
HOLY COW!! A girl can only handle so much:)
Nothing so far, has been so intense that I couldn't handle it. A bit painful at times but yesterday was long, like several scenes over several hours long. So, I'm feeling it everywhere today.
The night started with Heron cooking a wonderful dinner. He said it would be necessary to keep up my strength. Buffalo steak, salad, and naan bread. A perfectly meal, not too light and not too heavy. I thought it odd that He wasn't eating though. I asked a couple of times and He just told me not to worry, He would eat later. So I shrugged it off thinking that maybe He didn't want to be working His domly magic on a full stomach.
After my food had settled, He took me upstairs and I removed my clothes. When I entered the bedroom, I saw the Power Tower in the center of the room with a chair underneath. I was tied up just like the picture below. Sometimes, He draws inspiration from photos and this photo just happened to be the inspiration for the first scene of the night.
Once I was all tied up, He hoisted the rope as tight as it would go between my legs. I can't even begin to describe how uncomfortable the coarse rope was nestled deeply between my folds and up my backside. Actually, nestled is too nice of a word...I think the more appropriate description would be that it was cutting my lower body in half!!
Picking up the leather strap, He walked over and stood in front of me with that big grin that both scares me and makes me melt all at the same time. He commented about how swollen my pussy already was and used the opportunity to slap it several times in rapid succession. But each time I flinched or tried to pull away, the rope only dug deeper.
Picking up the crop next, He flicked mostly at my tits and nipples and threw in a few strikes down below for good measure. But every so often, He would reach up and tighten the rope, each time forcing me higher on my toes in a fruitless attempt to retreat from the pain in between my legs.. Before long, I was writhing about, yelping and begging Him to stop.
"Predicaments", He just kept taunting.
Grabbing my hair and pulling my head back, He used the cane, bringing it down several times across the tops of my tits. Thankfully, He finally put the cane down but not before He turned His attention to my pussy and thighs, leaving me with a couple of bright red stripes.
There were several other implements, most of which I hated. But I have to admit, there was one I enjoyed, and that was the fillet knife. Instantly, my body flooded the rope with moisture. And this time when He pulled my head back, I was warned not to move an inch. As He whispered in my ear, the tip of the knife traced the curves of my body, slowly...carefully. My breathing slowed and deepened and I was quickly about as lost as I could ever get. Nothing mattered in that moment except the blade as it danced across the flesh of my neck...my chest...across my nipples.
After kissing me deeply, He set the knife down and freed me from my bonds. He told me to go to "my place". So, I laid down on my side of the bed, anxiously awaiting whatever He planned next.
Sunday, February 8, 2015
Pulled in All Directions
For the moment, I have the house to myself. Heron is fishing, the girls are off getting their hair done, and I am thoroughly enjoying some peace and quiet. After being sick, the house is long overdue for a cleaning so I'm working on that along and along. Plenty of things to do but I just can't get last night off my mind. Maybe I need a cold shower.
After almost a month of complete chastity, you can imagine my excitement when Heron told me to take off my clothes and kneel in the center of the bed. Beaming from ear to ear, it might as well have been Christmas morning!
Kneeling with legs slightly spread, my wrists bound behind my back.
Rope...attached to the cuffs on my ankles, secured to the far corners of the headboard.
My upper body lays back, shoulders pressed against the mattress, back arching, tits pointing to the ceiling.
Rope...attached to the cuffs on my wrists, slides underneath me, secured to the center of the footboard.
My folds instantly lay open like a flower, completely exposed, throbbing with anticipation.
Nipples standing erect, longing to be touched. Smaller rope...attached to each one, secured to the far corners of the headboard, pulling them up and away from my body.
More rope. Thicker, coarser rope now wrapped around my neck, also tied to the headboard.
Everything pulled tight. I lose myself, finding comfort in the discomfort it brings, wondering what will be His next move.
The dildo glistens with my saliva, parting my lower lips, filling the ache between my legs.
The wand buzzes wildly on my clit, pressing and rotating, driving me to the edge almost instantly.
Pulling away just in time, He encourages my body to follow, taunting and teasing me with words.
Half of my body, squirming and desperate to move those few inches, seeking to find the source of pleasure. The other half, fighting against the bonds that hold me.
Nothing matters except the greediness that consumes me, the ultimate desire to fill the emptiness and quench the fire.
Finally finding what I need so badly, I ride the torment and the explosion seems to never end.
After almost a month of complete chastity, you can imagine my excitement when Heron told me to take off my clothes and kneel in the center of the bed. Beaming from ear to ear, it might as well have been Christmas morning!
Kneeling with legs slightly spread, my wrists bound behind my back.
Rope...attached to the cuffs on my ankles, secured to the far corners of the headboard.
My upper body lays back, shoulders pressed against the mattress, back arching, tits pointing to the ceiling.
Rope...attached to the cuffs on my wrists, slides underneath me, secured to the center of the footboard.
My folds instantly lay open like a flower, completely exposed, throbbing with anticipation.
Nipples standing erect, longing to be touched. Smaller rope...attached to each one, secured to the far corners of the headboard, pulling them up and away from my body.
More rope. Thicker, coarser rope now wrapped around my neck, also tied to the headboard.
Everything pulled tight. I lose myself, finding comfort in the discomfort it brings, wondering what will be His next move.
The dildo glistens with my saliva, parting my lower lips, filling the ache between my legs.
The wand buzzes wildly on my clit, pressing and rotating, driving me to the edge almost instantly.
Pulling away just in time, He encourages my body to follow, taunting and teasing me with words.
Half of my body, squirming and desperate to move those few inches, seeking to find the source of pleasure. The other half, fighting against the bonds that hold me.
Nothing matters except the greediness that consumes me, the ultimate desire to fill the emptiness and quench the fire.
Finally finding what I need so badly, I ride the torment and the explosion seems to never end.
 |
| Sometimes a picture really is worth a thousand words... |
Friday, February 6, 2015
A Predicament
As much as I had hoped things would settle down a bit now that Heron has a break from school, this week has shaped up to be another one filled with craziness and absolutely not a minute of privacy. Well, except that five minutes earlier in the week where I found myself in quite the predicament.
After cleaning up from dinner on Monday, I went up to the bedroom to change into something more comfortable. He, however, had other plans. Plans that involved my working out...kind of.
As soon as I entered the room, I saw that He had been fumbling around in the toy cabinet and had all sorts of stuff laid out on the bed. He told me to take everything off and put on a pair of workout shorts and my sneakers.
The room was so cold and I wished I could have had more clothes but I figured whatever He was up to, I would get warm in a hurry. After dressing as I was told, I knelt in the middle of the floor and waited beside the heater we have set up for those especially cold nights.
Off the main part of our bedroom is a sitting room, which we have turned into a small workout area. After a few minutes of waiting, He told me to go stand and wait for him on the treadmill.
While I waited, my body was covered in goosebumps, more from the cold than excitement. Watching as He walked over to me holding a pair of clover clamps, I knew pretty quickly his intentions. He began stroking my left nipple to a firm peak and I let out a gasp when He first put the first one on. The cold seemed to make everything more sensitive and intense.
He looped the chain from the clamps through the hand rail on the front of the treadmill and then attached the clamp to my right nipple. Realizing that this wouldn't be long enough, He went back to the pile on the bed, returning with another set of clovers.
I held my breath as He unclamped one side and re-clamped it with one of the clovers from the second set. He then looped and secured each chain individually around the handrail, allowing plenty more room for me to now stand up straight.
Oh, yeah...I shouldn't forget to mention that before putting on the clamps, my wrists had been handcuffed behind my back.
So standing next to me, He set the treadmill at 1 MPH and pressed START. No problem. Almost too slow really but an extremely comfortable speed. It was slow enough that I could walk easily without any pulling and very little bouncing. Don't know if you're like me but I try to be stealth like and move very little when wearing the clovers.
After the first minute, He increased it to 3 MPH. Fast enough now that things were starting to jiggle but I was keeping up with minimal discomfort.
Another minute and now 4 MPH. This is the speed at which the "predicament" started. Being as short as I am, 4 MPH is definitely considered speed walking. I'm forced to significantly speed up or suffer torturing my own nipples. But speeding up also means there is no way to avoid the bouncing and jiggling. Really, the lesser of two evils though.
I almost freaked out when I saw Him reach over to set it at 5 MPH, knowing I would be forced to jog. I wasn't so focused on the pain in my nipples anymore but my legs were burning like hell. And if I wasn't able to keep up, well you can imagine.
After the first minute, He increased it to 3 MPH. Fast enough now that things were starting to jiggle but I was keeping up with minimal discomfort.
Another minute and now 4 MPH. This is the speed at which the "predicament" started. Being as short as I am, 4 MPH is definitely considered speed walking. I'm forced to significantly speed up or suffer torturing my own nipples. But speeding up also means there is no way to avoid the bouncing and jiggling. Really, the lesser of two evils though.
I almost freaked out when I saw Him reach over to set it at 5 MPH, knowing I would be forced to jog. I wasn't so focused on the pain in my nipples anymore but my legs were burning like hell. And if I wasn't able to keep up, well you can imagine.
By 6 MPH, I was begging Him to stop, knowing my legs were about to give out. Apparently being sick had taken a toll on my stamina. He grabbed one of my arms to steady me and turned the machine off.
As soon as the clamps and the handcuffs came off and I was back on solid ground, He tapped my shoulders downwards signalling for me to kneel on the floor in front of Him. His cock was already straining to be set free so I quickly unzipped His pants and took Him in my mouth, savoring His excitement, until He stopped me wanting to save the rest for later.
As soon as the clamps and the handcuffs came off and I was back on solid ground, He tapped my shoulders downwards signalling for me to kneel on the floor in front of Him. His cock was already straining to be set free so I quickly unzipped His pants and took Him in my mouth, savoring His excitement, until He stopped me wanting to save the rest for later.
Apparently, He is quite the fan of predicament bondage and once I could catch my breath, I didn't mind it too much either:)
Hope you all have a great weekend!!
Monday, February 2, 2015
A Simple Comment
Beginning today, Daddy has a temporary reprieve from the school work that has been keeping him so busy. I don't think I've really ever discussed why he's going back to school. We both graduated many years ago. I have used my degree every day since, he has not. And while He has a good position, if He hopes to make Himself more marketable, it is going to be necessary to match education to work experience.
Anyways, it's been extremely trying on us all but I truly admire the fact that He's made such a commitment. There is no way I would want to go back to school at this stage of my life. Working for the government, I'm looking at being able to retire in less than a decade. How awesome is that?! Now whether I actually can is a completely different story.
But school takes up a lot of his evening and weekend time and even though He's in the house, He is typically barricaded in the office. Now, I'm not perfect, not even close, but I have tried to maintain His expectations of my service, even if that meant self-direction. Of course, I am always used sexually how and when the need suits Him, but honestly, much of the time I have felt pretty lonely and set aside. But these are my issues and feelings I try not to burden Him with it all because it's a temporary situation and He doesn't need any more stress.
However, yesterday was the end of one eight week session and the next doesn't start until next month. So He announces, while we were driving along from one place to another, that we would be "getting back to it" starting today.
We continued down the road a ways and I just stared out the window, mulling over that comment. On the one hand, it excited me that He would finally have some decent time for us, but what He said, and the way I was interpreting it, really wasn't sitting well.
It’s not as if I get a break from being submissive or from being His slave. So in my mind, there wasn’t anything I needed to “get back to”. The more I thought about it, the worse it was getting and I was dangerously close saying something that I would probably regret.
So, I waited a few minutes and tried to talk myself off that ledge. But something had to be said, I just had to figure out how to say it...politely. Finally, I asked if I could make a comment. He told me to speak my mind so I chose my words carefully. I explained, that in my opinion, I had stayed accountable in my service to Him but His comment made it seem as if my efforts were being negated.
He assured me that my service wasn’t in question and He only meant to make light of the fact that He would have more time for me, for maintenance, and for play. The conversation instantly put my mind at ease, but isn't it crazy how one simple comment can be so easily misconstrued?
Anyways, it's been extremely trying on us all but I truly admire the fact that He's made such a commitment. There is no way I would want to go back to school at this stage of my life. Working for the government, I'm looking at being able to retire in less than a decade. How awesome is that?! Now whether I actually can is a completely different story.
But school takes up a lot of his evening and weekend time and even though He's in the house, He is typically barricaded in the office. Now, I'm not perfect, not even close, but I have tried to maintain His expectations of my service, even if that meant self-direction. Of course, I am always used sexually how and when the need suits Him, but honestly, much of the time I have felt pretty lonely and set aside. But these are my issues and feelings I try not to burden Him with it all because it's a temporary situation and He doesn't need any more stress.
However, yesterday was the end of one eight week session and the next doesn't start until next month. So He announces, while we were driving along from one place to another, that we would be "getting back to it" starting today.
We continued down the road a ways and I just stared out the window, mulling over that comment. On the one hand, it excited me that He would finally have some decent time for us, but what He said, and the way I was interpreting it, really wasn't sitting well.
It’s not as if I get a break from being submissive or from being His slave. So in my mind, there wasn’t anything I needed to “get back to”. The more I thought about it, the worse it was getting and I was dangerously close saying something that I would probably regret.
So, I waited a few minutes and tried to talk myself off that ledge. But something had to be said, I just had to figure out how to say it...politely. Finally, I asked if I could make a comment. He told me to speak my mind so I chose my words carefully. I explained, that in my opinion, I had stayed accountable in my service to Him but His comment made it seem as if my efforts were being negated.
He assured me that my service wasn’t in question and He only meant to make light of the fact that He would have more time for me, for maintenance, and for play. The conversation instantly put my mind at ease, but isn't it crazy how one simple comment can be so easily misconstrued?
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