Sunday, January 10, 2016

My Pussy Doesn't Betray Me...She's Just Stupid

And here all these years, I've been thinking it was some deep-rooted psychological phenomenon.

Well, last night I finally figured it all out as I was straddling Heron, riding his cock. I couldn't help but notice she was a bit dry which is weird because that's not typically an issue.

Anyways, a few minutes go by and I lean over, pressing my body up against him so that we are face to face. He'd been relatively quiet up until that point but then he asked me (in ya know..THAT voice), "Are you ready to be punished this weekend?".

Whoooaaaa! Hold the phone...What the heck just happened here?

My body froze and I began tallying a mental list of what I might have done or might not have done.
Beginning to realize the list is perhaps just a bit longer than I thought, I also realize something else as soon as I resume rocking my hips.

She is now getting EXTREMELY squishy down there.

DAMN HER!

Please believe me when I say...I REALLY don't like punishment of any kind. That whole disappointment in myself is a real bitch and I'm usually crying like a little kid before it even starts.
So back to the fucking and his list of the intended consequences.

"You know what the punishment is when you forget the coat hangers, right?"
"Yes, Sir". SQUISH

"Do you think if I punish your ass, you will remember next time?"
"Yes, Sir". SQUISH...SQUISH

"Do you think if I punish your tits, you will remember next time?"
"Yes, Sir". OH GOD, why is she making this worse for me??

"Do you think if I punish your cunt, you will remember next time"
whimpering
"Yes, Sir". By now, he must feel like he's fucking a mop bucket. These sounds are so embarrassing

Of course, he couldn't help but point out her reaction to his threats which didn't help matters at all.
That's when it all occurred to me. It's not that she is betraying me, giving away some dark dirty secret that deep down I actually enjoy punishment.

She's just THAT damn stupid. Without understanding a single word, she hears that tone in his voice, and the poor little thing just gushes.

Think of it like talking to your dog. You can tell your little pooch that he's the filthiest most vile creature in the world for eating the crotch out of your most expensive panties and that you are going enjoy killing his sorry ass.

BUT say it with a sweet voice, and he just looks at you so lovingly, with ears perked and tail wagging. Why...because he doesn't understand a damn word you just said. He's just happy to have your attention.

So there you have it. Apparently my pussy is an attention whore with a really low IQ.

22 comments:

  1. You made me laugh, as I read this, because it is so true! Thanks for sharing the epiphany. So, so true.
    Amy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi there Amy! It's great to hear from you. Thank you so much for reading and enjoying! I think many of us know the struggle is very REAL. Lol

      xo

      Delete
  2. Oh I agree, and long may mine remain stupid, or else I'd been running out the door at the thought of our toy box.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know! Makes it so hard to convince them that we really do not like something in particular in that darn toy box! Great to hear from you DF!

      xo

      Delete
  3. This is hilarious! Well written.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Are you kidding me?!? I am going to pee my damn pants. Best title and a ridiculously funny post! LOVE it!!! -and sorry she's so stupid =]

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your comment almost made ME pee my pants! So funny!! I'm glad you liked it!

      xo

      Delete
  5. What a great post and exactly what happens. LOL!
    Hugs Lindy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Funny how that happens to us, isn't it?! I'm so happy to know I am not alone in this:)

      xo

      Delete
  6. That's how we men like it.. Stupid.... hehehe ...

    peace and love
    1ManView

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh my goodness! You almost made me spit out my drink laughing so hard. Yep..wet and stupid. I'll keep that in mind:)

      Delete

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