Picture Perfect

To me, this picture is a beautiful representation of how much my life has changed in less than one short year.

I am so grateful for all the new experiences thus far and the truly wonderful people that have shared in those along the way.

photo taken by @Depraved_Eros on Fetlife

To Heron, I think this photo served as inspiration to remind me just how torturous this darn little wand could be!  Saturday night he pulled it out for a little"fun", but that's a story for another post😊

A Night to Remember

Once again, I sit here (on a sore bottom mind you) trying to write a post, wondering where in the heck to start.  This is becoming quite a habit.  So many words, yet so little ability to make my brain function to get them written out.

Let's see....things are a bit slow on the Chrysalis front. I guess we haven't really had much time with the kids being out of school and all.  But we have now brought our families completely together which has been fun. 

Things might be a little slow on that front, but things have certainly been not been as far as Heron is concerned.

Starting a couple weeks back, he implemented a ritual.  I don't know that it will be a permanent one but it is until He tells me otherwise.  Each day, I am to select and present Him with an implement to paddle me with.  No reason for this other than that's what He wants me to do.  A little part of me wonders if this wasn't to help keep my emotions in check a bit.  As I started spiraling back a couple weeks ago, this has seemed to be a good way to keep me grounded and bring my focus back on what's most important...Him.

He has used everything from the ping pong paddle, to the crop, to the bamboo slotted spoon (which should really be called a Mother F****r for as bad as that hurts), to the large plastic ruler.  Last night was by far the most intense though.  First was 50 strikes with the bamboo walking stick and then 30 more with the bamboo slotted spoon.  It's been quite a while since I have woken up with bruises.  And over the last year or so, it has been near impossible to mark me but last night He was pretty  successful.  I know it's not the best way to cope with the pain, but all I could do was hold my breath and take each lick as it came.  It wasn't until He was done that my tears finally spilled.   

We have also somehow managed eight straight days of sex which is absolutely unheard of in our house.  Some of it has been sweet and tender but some of it has been downright rough and naughty...and so much fun!

The first of the eight nights was one of those nights.  You know the kind...one that just stands out in your mind as particularly memorable.  The last time He had attempted to use the Tens unit, the batteries were dead so He bought new batteries and apparently decided it was time to try again.  Yep...fresh batteries did the trick!

With my ankles and wrists cuffed and attached to each of the four corners of the bed, I laid there spread eagle, exposed, and completely helpless which is His favorite position for me.  Who am I kidding...it's one of my favorites too!

He gently placed the four pads around my rapidly swelling and wet pussy, making sure to avoid my extremely sensitive clit area.  I flinched when He first turned it on but then settled into the gentle hum and the feeling of it pulsing around my pelvis.  Leaning over me, He stroked my body and kissed me deeply.  When He was sure that I was focused more on the pleasure of His touch, He turned it up just to remind me of the pain.  He continued alternating like this, sometimes also adding in a few strikes of the flogger across my tits, until He had reached the highest setting on the unit 

I thought He might have been done but He was actually far from finished.  Now, He moved the pads around so that one was directly on my clit and told me He intended to again get it to the highest power.  To add to my discomfort, He put the clover clamps on each of my nipples  Believe it or not, even with the pain in my nipples, had something also been moving inside of me, I feel certain I could have had an orgasm from the electricity pulsing through my clit.

Now instead of distracting my pain with kissing and flogging, He used the violet wand.  Each time He increased the intensity, He teased my body with the wand, tracing it across my flesh.  He was quite proud of Himself for leaving the red markings of the word "whore" across my stomach, which I proudly wore the rest of the night.  But thankfully they were gone by the next day.  

Finally getting to the highest setting, He turned the Tens off, removed the pads, and with a huge sadistic grin on His face, used the violet wand to continue zapping me directly on the clit until I was writhing and whimpering, trying to arch off the bed and fight against the restraint that held me fixed. 

Next, He brought out the knife.  It's a switch blade type, and just to hear the sound it gives me shivers of anticipation. I never really thought I would ever enjoy knife play as much as I do but it really gets me going when it's threatening me in just the right spots.  With my body sill spread eagle, He climbed over me and settled between my legs, warning me not to move.  Just to be sure, He puts straps just above my knees and fastened them to the sides of the bed forcing my legs into a semi-butterflied position.

Slowly and ever so gently He began dragging the blade of the knife over my clit.  Then I felt the coldness of the blade touching and parting my lips just before sliding in.   

Don't you dare move. 

He moved it ever so slightly in and out.  My body didn't even so much as flinch.  My breathing slowed and deepened and I drifted off lost in the moment. 

At some point afterwards, I realized He had replaced the switch blade with a butter knife but part of the game is not knowing when He actually did that.  Beautiful mind fuck! 

After so much stimulation, it was sweet relief, when He finally removed His clothes and took me as I still lay helpless and bound in the bed.

What a night!  I have another one to write about but that's going to have to wait until the next post:)    

Sparks Fly: A Post By Heron

Bound. Helpless. You wait for me.

As the neon crackles to life, your eyes widen.

Is it in fear? Anticipation? Perhaps a little of both?

Tracing your curves, I run the glass along your flesh.

You gasp as the static torments your body.

Sparks fly.

One moment you are moaning in agony, the next in ecstasy.

Your breast rise and fall as your breath quickens.

Again the glass strokes your flesh, grazing a nipple, your stomach, your back.

One moment you pull away, the next you strain forward eagerly awaiting.

Again the wand hums. Louder this time.

Sparks fly.

You slump forward as I give you a moment to recover.

Only this time, I am one with the wand.

I am the conduit.

I stroke you with my hands or brush you with my fingertips.

Finally I touch that spot that desperately needs caressing.

Static arcs from me, tormenting your flesh.

You scream.

Sparks fly.

Later, when you are safely tucked into bed I pull you close to me.

I softly smooth the the hair back from your face.

Leaning closer, I brush your lips with mine.

Our eyes lock.

Sparks fly.

The Right Touch

Something I have thought about a lot lately is touch because over the years, I have come to realize that I am just not a touchy-feely person.  In fact, sometimes it's as if there is an invisible box around me, with only a few people that are granted entrance inside.  I definitely am not the type of person to intrude into someone else's personal space while talking nor do I reach out to casually touch them, and I appreciate when people respect my space in return. However, I understand some people thrive on touch and that's ok.  If I'm not comfortable, I just attempt to move slightly and re-establish my invisible box.     

Of course, my kids seem to own the key to this imaginary box of mine, barging in whenever they feel like. But that's different and perfectly fine with me for the most part.  There are days when I am touched out and I have to say "ok...mommy needs some space" but I try to remind myself that this precious time is short and one day they won't be interested in sitting on my lap (even though they are really too big for that now) or sharing snuggles.

The dogs are kind of like this too.  No sense trying to create space with them because they force themselves in my lap anyways.  With cute faces and wagging tails, who can resist?

Now, Daddy is altogether different.  With Him, I have no imaginary box or boundaries.  I want to be in His personal space as much as I need for Him to be in mine...all the time. Nothing makes my thoughts spiral out of control faster than a lack of physical connection between us and I'm not just referring to intimacy.  I'm talking about a hug, a brush on my arm or back, sitting at His feet with my head in His lap, anything.  His touch has the power to keep me grounded through everything life throws at us. 

Speaking of touch and grounding, this makes me think about what happens when electricity passes through two people in love or lust.  Not the figurative "spark", even though after all this time together, Daddy's touch still lights me up and makes my stomach flutter.  What I am talking about is electricity literally running though Him...and into me. 

I've mentioned the Violet Wand before and how much we both love that toy.  Well, there is an adaptor (or Body Contact Accessory) that allows the person wielding the wand to become the conductor. 

The metal plate fits snuggly against His skin (He likes to tuck it inside the waist of His pants) and the other end then plugs into where the glass of the wand would normally be inserted.  With one hand, He can hold the base of the wand, leaving His other hand to freely roam around touching and zapping my body.

There is a slight downside though.  It zaps the "giver" as much as it does the "receiver" when skin connects.  Him being the sadist, wasn't too much impressed with that the first time He tried it.   

But the other day He pulled it out and tried it again.  He spent some time working me over with the wand itself before hooking up the attachment.  At first, He just lightly touched my stomach with one finger and we both flinched as it delivered a nice shocked to us both. 

Eventually, His hand and fingers were sending shock waves of electricity along my stomach, the inside of my thighs, and across my tits.  Finally, His fingers made their way to that ever so sensitive spot between my legs. 

I tried several times to write about how hot this was and I just don't think I can do it justice so I will leave it as a moment between Him and I...and your imagination! 

 

When one flesh is waiting, there is electricity in the merest contact-Wallace Stegner

          

An Afternoon Alone

Today I found myself completely naked and tied to the massage table, all of my limbs drawn tight and secured to each corner. Oh..it's been quite while since we played like this and I am almost giddy with excitement but not for long.

As soon as the blindfold is secured on my face, turning everything dark, my breathing quickens and I try not to flinch every time I hear the slash of His flogger teasing, dancing through the air directly above my body.  Then, it connects with my chest, landing with a thump across each of my tits at first, then on the folds of my pussy.  The speed and intensity picks up and I am in a good place as He moves the flogger across the entire front of my body. Every now and then the flogger catches the tip of my nipple and I wince from the sting but it is fleeting as He quickly moves to a different part of my body. 

Now, I hear the belt sliding out of His pants, a sound so sexy and breathtaking every time.  Although, I always find I am never very fond of it by the time He is done with me.  The smooth leather kisses my tits and nipples.  He is being easy and for that I am thankful, but a few quick licks to my pussy is all it takes, and as usual, I am arching and straining trying to try get away.  Then He goes back to my my tits.  Strike after strike lands across the upper and lower curves of my tits. This continues until I am yelling out loud each time the belt clips my sensitive nipples, a reaction that always draws His displeasure.

Once the belt focuses on tormenting my pussy, my tears turn to moans and sobs and each strike causing my legs to reflexively draw together.  Again, I hear the frustration in His voice at my lack of control as He commands me to keep my legs open and offer myself to Him and the belt.  I've gone soft and can handle little of what I used to, but He continues until satisfied that I have had enough.

Any relief I feel when He finally stops and removes the blindfold is gone because now I am staring at the  violet wand in His hand.  He dances the wand around my body, zapping the already pink, tender flesh of my tits and nipples and even takes way too much delight in zapping certain areas around my face, which is really disconcerting and agitating. 

Never knowing where the wand is going to strike next keeps me from settling into the pain and brings more cries and tears, particularly when the electricity touches my swollen clit. 

I am sobbing, fighting it...

I want Him to stop...I don't want Him to stop...

I need to endure...I want Him to take what He needs from me. 

With puffy eyes and a stuffed up nose (an attractive sight I am sure), tears continue to trickle down my face after He stops, unties me, and orders me to lay on the floor.  Pulling His pants down just enough to expose His fully erect cock, He attempts to thrust into me.  It takes some work to push through my swollen hole, but once He does, the tears stop, my body instantly responds to Him and every part of me is like a live wire.  It doesn't take long before all the stimulation of the afternoon comes washing over me and my body releases wave after wave of pleasure around Him. 
_________________________________________________________________________

We haven't had a session that intense lately, but it was the physical and mental release I needed.  I keep my emotions in check so hard and my tears locked in so tight that sometimes I have to be driven pretty hard to let go.  But I will say that I experienced an instant drop like I never have before.  I could feel myself shutting down within about 10 minutes. Granted, we didn't have time for aftercare since our alone time abruptly came to an end.  But I felt so out of it, shaky, and nauseous that I just had to go sleep it off for a little while.  However, once I woke up, I felt refreshed and at peace! 

    

 

The Slut

She wonders who is crossing the room with her Master.  Is it a man or woman?  

Something tells her that it's a man, then she starts to listen to the sound of his breathing and is almost 100% sure.  She's also partly sure that she knows who it might be and that puts her at ease.  Her Master instructs him to take a seat on the couch while He provides a demonstration of the violet wand.  Making small talk about the different attachments and intensities, she thinks how smart He was to pick this toy.  Not only is it one of her favorites but it is sure to take her nervous and self-conscious mind to a different place.

Her palms are sweaty and because she can't move anything else, her fingers begin tracing little circles nervously on the massage table.  She hears the wand start up but still jumps when it first touches her leg.  As He continues moving it over her body, she focuses less on the fact that someone is watching and slowly lets the sensations wash over her.  She is in a good place, that is until He pauses the wand over her pussy, delivering a zap though her shorts strong enough to make her arch as far as her tied down body will allow and yell 'Owww!". Definitely too loud for a hotel room unless you want more visitors so He gives her a firm warning.  Despite her best effort to stay quiet, she yelps even louder the next time.

Now with the ball gag in place, He invites the visitor to come take charge of the wand for a moment. So many conflicting thoughts should be going through her mind, but she feels pretty relaxed and doesn't mind as the wand travels over her leg, around her pelvis, and finds it's way to her breasts. 

Once the wand is back in her Master's hands, she hears Him ask, "Could you remove that?".  Before she even realizes what He means, the thin little cut-off wife beater is being gently torn down the middle, allowing her tits to completely fall free.  With a little chuckle, she accepts her fate and reminds herself that she has proudly shown them all over the internet!

It wasn't long though before she felt hands on bare flesh...different hands than she is used to.  Her mind is so lost as her nipples are massaged to stiff peaks and she can't even be certain but thought clamps might have just been put on her.  She realizes later, when they come off that they are, in fact, the clovers.   

Funny that her nipples didn't hurt, but her big hoop earrings were becoming rather uncomfortable getting caught between her neck and the table so she kindly asks Master to remove them, not thinking that her request would come at at price.  You asked for something...now I am expect something in return.  Using scissors, He cut her shorts up each side, leaving just a thin piece of fabric over her pussy.

As He resumes playing with the wand, He sees how she is desperately struggling to retain her covering (and dignity), refusing to move her lower body too much.  He uses the wand to zap her inner thighs over and over, laughing and commenting when she finally gets the message to spread her legs wider.   She now realizes that the last piece of fabric has fallen away and is no longer protecting her.  

Then the vibrators!  Oh God the vibrators!  Really it is almost more than she can bear but certainly takes her mind off being exposed.  The two men work her with the Hitachi on the outside and a smaller one on the inside.  She knows she is dripping wet, but doesn't care and is absolutely dying to cum.  They refuse to let her though, stopping every time she gets close.  Apparently, she was wrong in ever thinking that it would be difficult getting off in front of someone else.  Under the right circumstances and given the chance, she most definitely could! 

Now, she hears her Master shuffling around trying to move the fuck machine onto the table.  She thinks it's His visitor's hands that are on her again, this time spreading her open for the extra large dildo attached to the machine.  As it begins to move in and out of her slowly and rhythmically, the visitor moves her right hand and places it on his dick so that she could feel it bulging through his pants.

The caged slut begins to emerge from whatever deep recess she was banished to so long ago and  responds without hesitation, immediately taking his cock in her mouth when he untied her hands.   Shifting her head over to the side of the table, he continues to fuck her face.  One would think that she would have flinched or fought it at this point, but no...not her.

She still didn't fight it as her legs were untied and she was led off the table to kneel at his feet.  She continued sucking while her Master knelt down beside her and spanked her ass and pussy with a switch.  Not only was she moaning and gagging on the cock in front of her but she was flooding with wetness and desperately wanting more.   

She had found complete acceptance in her position and quite possibly...finally found her sub-space!

And as usual, despite all her previous reservations, the way her body responded told her dark secret.  Not only did she accept it, but she was thoroughly enjoying it!






 





        





 

The Note

After meeting for lunch, He slips a note into her hand with a hotel key inside as she gets into her car.  She quickly unfolds this new set of instructions as she watches Him walk away.  The queasy feeling in her stomach intensifies as she reads:

YOU NEED TO HURRY TO GET ALL OF THIS DONE.  YOU HAVE 15-17 MINUTES.  Go to the hotel and go to room 214.  It is on the first floor.  Let yourself in and you will see the clothes you are supposed to wear (plus your boots).  Jump in the shower first and bring yourself close to orgasm, but vocally remind yourself of why you are on orgasm restriction.  DO NOT CUM!  Take a quick warm shower and make sure that you have cleaned your dripping pussy.  Towel off...no lint on your pussy.  Make sure you go to the bathroom, since you may not get many breaks, but don't leave a single piece of tissue on your slutty pussy.  Put on the shirt and shorts and boots.  Place all of the items that you are required to have in your purse on the long table.  Once you are done with that, facing the wall, place your left knee in the seat of the sofa and your right leg over the side so you are straddling the arm.  Rub your pussy back and forth on the arm of the sofa, while you wait for me to arrive.  DON'T YOU DARE CUM!  Do not move once you are in position.  I will take complete control of your body once I arrive.  You have no choice but to do as I say.  You will have control over nothing, so you are free to enjoy.

She quickly drives to the hotel reading the note again on the way trying to see if she can gather any clue as to what's in store for her.  Opening the door to room 214, she sees all that He has been preparing this morning.  Scanning the room quickly, she makes note of the fuck machine, the massage table, and an entire table full of implements.  She grins at the sight of her favorite toy, the violet wand!

With no time to waste, she undresses and rushes to the shower.  For three days now, she has been required to masturbate multiple times daily, but is forbidden to cum because of her transgression last week...cumming during sex without asking permission.  Fondling her already swollen clit in the shower and nearing orgasm, she stops and says out loud as she has all week, "I am not allowed to cum without permission".

After finishing her quick shower, she goes to bathroom and slips into the itty bitty hot pink shorts, cut off wife beater, and black high heeled boots He left neatly on the massage table.  Straddling the arm of the couch...waiting...her heart feels like it's going to thump right out of her chest. 

She hears the click of the door and her breath catches...

Just Me and My Toys

Looking at all these toys, one might think that I rather enjoyed myself but THAT was not my lot in life last week. 

MASTER'S ASSIGNMENT: I was to ride home from work each day with these little friends tormenting me.

RULE: No orgasm all week

I had already been out of commission for the 2 weeks prior so finding out about this little assignment didn't sound like much fun, for me anyways. 

Monday and Tuesday- I was to use the clothespins and the purple butt plug. 

Wednesday and Thursday- Add the wireless bullet vibrator for my pussy.

Friday- Add the other vibrator for external clit stimulation.

Luckily, I made it through the week with no "accidental" orgasms and no car accidents.  I'm not sure how I would have explained any of it to a police officer.   

Every ride home, I was so turned on I could barely stand it. Knowing that I would be denied any release anytime soon, I still just felt alive and happy to be doing as He wished.  As soon as I got out of the car, there were kids and house duties to tend to, so I was able to put away my toys and get on with the rest of my day. 

But every night, after working so hard to please Him, being good in every possible way I could think of, I rolled over and went to bed horny as hell...fighting the urge to cry, beg, and plead for His affection.  This time, I would find acceptance and not allow myself to break down...but I secretly hoped His resolve would break.  No such luck!! 

By Friday, my 45 minute drive home almost made me crazy.   

The feeling of complete fullness.

The constant humming both inside and outside my pussy.

The ache in my nipples.

No doubt, the other days felt good but adding the clit stimulation was sending me over the edge.  I could have fully enjoyed myself right there sitting in traffic.       

Oh, it would have been so easy to allow myself an orgasm.  He would never have known but the guilt for disobeying and/or being dishonest would have been a much harder burden to carry.  So I fought the urge until it was almost making me sick to my stomach.

Thankfully, I was rewarded for all my hard work later that night with a nice play session including the violet wand and the vibrator.  Finally after being teased and edged until tears were streaming down my face, I was allowed the release that I so desperately needed.

Some people don't prescribe to the philosophy of orgasm denial/control.  Honestly, I can't say that I like it a whole lot myself.  However, it boils down to acceptance and trust.  These are the two things I remind myself of often. 

Acceptance is understanding that I am His to do with as He desires in all things, not just the things I enjoy.  Trust is simply having faith in Him, the path that He chooses for us and the decisions that are made to get us there.

       

What NOT to do with a TENS Unit!!

In my last post, Memories of a Night with Master's New Toy, I just briefly mentioned the TENS unit.  Well.........let's just say I left out the details for a reason.  I really could only do it justice by dedicating an entire post on the experience!!

I have read accounts of mid-scene blooper moments and quite frankly was a little jealous that I didn't seem to have something in all of our time together to contribute.  I guess, give it long enough and something is bound to happen. 

In the midst of the fucking machine and Hitachi scene, Master thought that it was quite funny to light me up with the TENS by placing them very strategically close to my pussy and increasing the voltage until I was yelping and jumping all over the table.  He really was laughing at me!!  Pretty sadistic if you ask me:)

That is until He decided it was time to move on to the Violet Wand, but in His excitement forgot to turn the TENS unit OFF before removing the pads from my body.  Boy...did He get a SURPRISE!! 

Then it was I, while strapped to a massage table, who couldn't stop laughing when He first yelled, "GOD DAMMIT!!" as the electricity coursed through His hand and then cussed Himself for being a "FUCKING IDIOT" (His quote...not mine)

This time...it was a Master's lesson learned.  HAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

Memories of a Night With Master's New Toy: The Violet Wand

I knew this week would be crazy and it certainly didn't disappoint.  Everyone was home and family life was back to normal...maybe even a little crazier than usual, hence my inability to put together a blog post all week.

Unfortunately, in a the craziness, I slipped on a couple of chores and forgot to properly greet Master as He came in from work one day in particular.  A sincere apology and a punishment with a fly swatter on my ass and nipples quickly reminded me of my place.

Other than that, not much to report so I thought I would reminisce about my first experience with Master's new toy...the Violet Wand!

Just before the end of our "official" training period, Master introduced me this new toy of His.  I cringed with nervousness as He pulled it out of the box with almost giddy delight, like a little boy at Christmas!  A few days later, with me lying on the bed, He testing it out starting at the lowest intensity and slowly increasing, really just getting a feel for how it worked and judging my reactions to the different intensities on different areas of my body.  It also comes with several different attachments, some definitely delivering a more of a zap than others. 

Just a hint...smaller tip = more intense!  At least I think so. 

He found it pretty funny watching me jump, flinch, and squeal every single time He touched my skin or waved it over my body.  I lay there thinking, how was this was going to be erotic at all?  The sound that it was emitting reminded me of the blue bug zapper that hangs outside and I could actually smell the electricity!  On the other hand, He thoroughly enjoyed watching the purple light and was fascinated to watch as the tiny little bolt of electricity reached into the air and connected with my skin.

Moving on to the night I was collared....

In my post, Collaring of Nightbird, I made reference to my favorite part of being strapped to the massage table and experiencing one of the most amazing orgasms with a combination of different things.  Well, the grand finale of this 3 hour "Attack of the Senses" session was quite intense.  With both of my arms and legs spread and strapped down, Master brought the fucking machine and placed it on the table between my legs.  With the largest (and my most favorite dildo attachment I should add), He positioned it and turned it on so that it was slowly sliding in and out of me.  The Hitachi, which had been strapped to an adjustable microphone stand, was brought over and He made sure that it was driving me crazy by humming directly on my clit.  Oh....Oh....I was already in heaven but it gets better!

He pulls out the TENS unit and has a little fun with it shocking first my tits and then the areas around my pussy (which will lead me to my next post...LOL!). 

Now, He is ready to incorporate the Violet Wand for the first time into one of our play sessions.  I am not sure why this little gadget is so intimidating to me but it is.  Again, as He waves it all over my body, I jump and squeal, but after a while of tormenting me He focuses the wand all around my pussy...up around the top portion near my tattoos and even around the opening of my pussy and around to my ass.  Laying there, trying to figure out what this sensation reminded me of, I finally determined it felt almost like getting tattooed and oddly this helped me to relax.  Weird...huh?

He doesn't let up at all, just keeps waving the wand in circular motions all around the lower portion of my body and the pain began to meld and intensify the pleasure of the fucking machine and Hitachi.  I thought my entire body was about to short circuit as I could feel the almost blinding orgasm that was making it's way to the surface.  When I finally let it go, it is likely that anyone standing outside on our street probably hear the animalistic moans and screams coming out of me.  I can't recall ever making any such sounds! 

Ah, what a great night and I am certainly no longer intimidated by that little purple light:)