Thank you to one of my readers for sending me some questions to write about. My motivation to write lately has been in the toilet as I have been spending an over abundance of time researching and implementing a paleo diet for the family. Well, truthfully, it's mostly for Heron and I. The kids get to still eat of some of the stuff they like. But overall, it takes ALOT of work. Maybe I will post more about it later.
Anyways, this reader was curious about our dynamic in the company of others.
the short version is that we are almost always in the company of others
but mainly family, neighbors, or other parents at soccer events so our
dynamic is pretty well discrete. There may be certain things between us
that only we know the meaning but mostly no one would catch on. It
could be as simple as wearing my hair a particular way, waiting for him
to begin eating first, or walking just slightly behind him. Regardless
of who is around, I always stop what I am doing and greet him. When
speaking to him, or about him, it's always respectful. Yes, it's
possible that someone could pick up on the hints of power exchange
between us, but I'm not overly concerned about it because hopefully it
just comes off as me being a loving and attentive wife.
Is there any element of D/s when you two go out with another couple?
have never been much for going out with other couples. Unfortunately,
both of us kind of lost our youths early and because of that, didn't
maintain many friendships into adulthood. There have been times through
the years it has really bothered me...that we didn't have a group of
friends to hang out with, go to dinners or get our families together for
We did meet a couple through FL about a year
ago and have gone out with them several times. Even though they are
fully aware of our dynamic and are very accepting, they are not in the
dynamic themselves, so we have felt it best to keep it low-key in front
of them so as to not place them in any uncomfortable situations, other
than maybe Him ordering for me.
Are any of his friends aware of the dynamic? Are any of yours?
I am going to assume that this question is referring to friends outside of the lifestyle.
does have one friend that knows and has shared quite a bit about our
dynamic with him. In fact, when I first started my blog, Heron gave him
the address and he has been keeping up with it since!
on the other hand, really don't have any friends that I consider close
enough to share this part of my life. I lost touch, way back when with
all my friends from school and even though there have been several good
friends since then, they have all come and gone out of my life for one
reason or another. As a manager, I am not afforded the ability to make
friends and confide in anyone at work. For the most part, my circle of
girlfriends the past decade or so has been the moms of my daughters
friends. And I find I don't really have much in common with any of
them. Plus it tends to get awkward the moment when your kids get into a
fight or simply outgrow each other and no longer hang out. So, I tend to
now steer away from hanging out with them. My dynamic isn't something I
would have ever shared with them anyways because they seem to be a
gossipy bunch and I certainly would never want my child judged for my
If my little sister was still here, I
suspect I might have shared it with her. She lived her life pretty wide
open and would never have judged me for anything. Knowing her, she
probably would have thought it was pretty cool. I can't even begin to
tell you how much I miss having her to talk to.
Do you have an external confidant that you can bounce things off of?
I do have a couple of ladies that I have met through the lifestyle. If
I needed to talk about something, they would listen and give me honest
feedback from their perspective. Through my blog, I have also made some
online acquaintances, both male and female, which have helped
tremendously and they are always just an email away.